Oh no, you're thinking. You messed up.
And, this might be your worst mistake.
Now, your conscious is unclear. Your nerves are shot. You're constantly looking over your shoulder, waiting for God to smite you.
Because that's what you think He does, right? He's a God who's out to get you, wanting to get even, to blackmail you, to hold your mistakes over your head to pressure you to change.
If you believe this in any way, I'm writing this post for you.
Because, if I can be honest with you, the God you've conjured up in your mind sounds more like a crazy ex-girlfriend than He does a loving father. But, perhaps it's hard for you to know who He is because you haven't learned who He isn't, which is why I thought today would be a good day to let you know who He isn't, starting with this:
God is not some crazy ex-girlfriend.
When you mess up, God doesn't wait for you to fall asleep so He can slash your tires, nor does He follow you from behind in the dark when you leave from work. He doesn't leave notes of intimidation on the windshield of your car, nor does He hack your email after triple-guessing your password. He doesn't sit up late with rollers in His hair thinking about the many ways He'll punish you when you get back. He doesn't make you do anything humiliating to show just how sorry you are. No tap dance is required to gain His forgiveness, nor do you need to sign any paperwork so God can review your qualifications for grace. He doesn't bring up your past sins when you two have a hard conversation, nor does He have mood swings and snaps out of impatience. The God who sees you when you've done everything right is the same God who sees you when you made the worst mistake of your life. And, He does not delight in making your life miserable when you mess up.
Our bible says that He's gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. But, then it goes onto say that He's not just abounding in love, but He is love. He's the very thing many of us are looking to have!
And the little, irritable god we imagine after a mistake is made does not exist. I mean, come on. Let's not get silly. Do we really believe God would stoop as low as a crazy ex?
The only thing God wants you to do when you mess up is to repent. This simply means to turn from your ways and turn towards Him.
Unlike a crazy ex, God doesn't want revenge. He just wants reconciliation. This is why He sent His Son, Jesus, to die on the cross for your sins.
Yes, friend. You read that correctly!
To die for your sins, not dangle them over your head after you've already confessed!
God doesn't want to hurt you as much as you might've hurt Him, nor is He waiting for you to mess up again. He's rooting for you to do exactly what He's called you to do. And, now is a good time to laugh at the enemy in his face for thinking that God is against us, that He wants to punish us, that not only is He waiting for us to fall, but He's looking for ways to push us over the edge! Are we serious? How long are we gonna let the enemy lie? Our bible says in Romans 5:8 that Christ died for us while we were still sinners just to demonstrate His great love!
So, God's hand of forgiveness is already extended towards us.
All we have to do now is repent. To turn. And come running back to Him. And I've learned that as long as we forgive one another, God's forgiveness doesn't pend. It doesn't take Him 3-5 business days to process our apology. He is always ready to forgive, to show mercy, to welcome us back in His presence. And unlike any crazy, abusive, controlling, insecure or hot-headed ex, God wants you to receive the fullness of His grace by turning from what you once knew and running into His arms that are wide open.